my life is fun.
seriously. like fun.


the long weekend was much needed.
PP is halfway done!
yeay!
now i can continue my pp in peace knowing that my advisor is very happy with my progression.
so now, peaceful pp continuation,
peaceful working,
and peaceful sleeping.


during the last weekend, i managed to sleep well, despite thinking about the endless pp.
and i was able to contemplate about my life, like the pp wasnt enough to keep me thinking.
decided to not insist on getting things that i know its impossible to get with a blink of the eye.
but it's the joy of fantasizing that keeps me thinking.


however,
i want to go to rome.
paris, milan, london!
maldives, south africa, australia!
amsterdam, new york, canada!
puerto rice, hawaii, pittsburgh!
i want to go to sleep.

today, made me realised,
i'm probably just very self-centered!

days ago, J, returned back to my life.
brought me invinsible flowers and gave me unfelt hugs and kisses.
drove me around the imaginable country in his omitted wagon.
illusionarily wine-dine me sumptious carbs.
and apocraphaly lulled me to sleep.
my life was ineffable (maybe i thot it was),
until finally it struck me,
really?

days ago (also), H, reappeared back to my life.
didn't bring me invinsible flowers nor gave me unfelt hugs and kisses.
drove me around the country in his pimped-up black ride.
unillusionarily wine-dined me sumptious carbs.
and (also) apocraphaly lulled me to sleep.
my life was ineffable (so i didn't know)
until it finally struck me,
really?

J and H,
both unillusionary people,
that obviously shoot out in my life.
however similar or different they may be,
it is me that they centred to.


a former bestfriend (now former enemy) told me that my life is not evolving around myself only.
no matter how fucked up things are, i gotta admit, that life is still going on, time never stops.

i tried with all my heart to halt that finger from pointing to the clockwise direction.
it did not stop, unfortunately unquestionably.
however here's the thing,
if you can't beat it, join it.

thinking about J and H,
the episode of story in my life,
puts the life on hold.
school turned shitty, work turned soury.
life was so pushy, words oh so mushy.
nonsensical thoughts streamed into mind,
vulgarities were prayed, every second of the day.

i decided, let's go time, play this game of life, life,
who's got to rush the life!
fuck you!

it's been like, OH-so-draggy day, week.
the start of august is so no needed...
everything seems so dooooomed!